Monday, December 28, 2015

What to do if your co-worker self-identifies as a cow?

In order to avoid the wrath of the New York Commission on Human Rights, you should not insult him/her/it by attempting to communicate in anything other than "moos".  Cows are known to urinate and defecate where ever it is convenient, so if they happen to do this in your personal area, you must take any no notice.  Cow Identity is a serious self-image issue, and we cannot tolerate unlawful discrimination.  The commission can impose civil penalties up to $125,00 for violations, and up to $250,000 for violations that are the result of willful, wanton, or malicious conduct.  See the above link for additional penalties.

4 comments:

Rummuser said...

Amazing! It is something that our own lunatics will envy!

Max Coutinho said...

Looney,

LOL LOL In Britain, plenty of people literally identify others and themselves as cows "You bloody cow" "I look like a bloody cow, don' I?" so it's problematic. However, the type of cows you refer to here is more complex: that cow, your co-worker, needs to be tamed and potty-trained lol...I feel I may get into troubles for saying this lol lol...

Cheers

Looney said...

@Rummuser, it looks like this is an area where even California is falling behind New York!

Looney said...

@Max, one of the novelties here is that only males can discriminate against those with cow syndrome. I have yet to hear of females being sent to the re-education camps on this issue.