Friday, March 06, 2015

RRRIIIIINNNNGGGGG! "This is a Red Alert from the Fremont Police Department"

I hang up and go back to bed, but then 30 minutes later the call happens again: "This is a Red Alert from the Fremont Police Department, stay on the line or press any button for a message."

I was skeptical.  Haven't the communists already taken over California?  Or perhaps we are facing a Zombie Apocalypse?  No, that would be a "Pale Alert".  There was no tension reported in nearby Oakland recently, so I was pretty sure that this wasn't the source.  We won't mention what kind of alert that would be.  No Earthquakes.  We should be safe from Tsunamis where I am at, and a firestorm requires high winds and heat, which we aren't experiencing.  Carmageddon happens out here now and then, but not in the middle of the night.

Finally curiosity got the best of me and I pressed the button to listen to the rest of this dire warning: "Mr. Lee has been found.  We repeat, Mr.  Lee.  Has.  Been.  Found.  We thank you for your assistance."  Were they talking about the car?  My brain was fuzzy and the first thing that came to mind was the General Lee.  No, "Mr." Lee cannot be the "General" Lee.  Perhaps someone had named their cat "Mr. Lee".  Or maybe I heard wrong and it was really "Mr. Li".  Then I start having a fuzzy recollection of another call like this a few weeks back where the alert was with regard to an elderly man wandering off.  This reminds me of Lee Kuan Yew, the founder and backseat leader of Singapore, whose health is deteriorating and may soon wander off permanently into the heavens.  But Lee Kuan Yew is the sort who finds you, not the other way around.  Then I think of the Dear Leader who runs North Korea, and quickly realize I am in error.  The leader of North Korea is a Kim.  Mr. Lee is the prime minister of South Korea.  No wonder he wandered off.

A final note is that there are probably hundreds of Mr. Lee's and Mr. Li's here in Fremont.


Max Coutinho said...

Hi Looney,

LOL LOL LOL oh my G-d! You have time to think of all these things when your sleep has been interrupted? I bow to you.

So, who's Mr. Lee and why are they calling you to tell you that he's been found? Is this standard practise in the US or just in your State?

This post generated both laughter and many questions...


Looney said...

Max, a hyperactive brain can be a curse, especially when you are having a tough time sleeping!

I presume Mr. Lee was just an elderly man in the neighborhood. What I imagine is that an immigrant family nearby brought their aging parents over after they moved to the US, who don't know English and are needing care. Somehow the father wandered off.

The use of emergency systems for missing persons issues seems to be increasing.